Positively Gruden: No Love for Lovie Edition

Hey fellow Grudenites, it’s time for another helping of Positively Gruden, where I serve up the top 10 absurdities, hyperbole and just general weirdness that comes out of the mouth of our favorite color analyst.  After last Monday’s Debbie downer, Gruden returned to form for the Bears-Giants game with some solid zingers.  He was particularly entranced with long arms, long names, and the coaching genius of Tom Coughlin.  So without further ado:

10. “I really think Hakeem Nicks is a future superstar in this league!”

9.  On Jay Cutler, “You don’t question his toughness. I’ve seen this guy get up from a lot of train wrecks.”

8.  After a routine 10-yard pass from Manning, “Eli’s ability to throw the ball falling away on the money, how many guys make that throw?” (at least 25)

7.  On Tom Coughlin, the instant replay mastermind, “Tom Coughlin wins more challenges than any coach I’ve ever seen!” (Actually, this might be true)

6.  Did I mention Gruden likes Tom Coughlin? “There aren’t many guys that are like this that I’ve met. He loves football, he loves where he is. I just hope my son gets to play for Coughlin!” (interestingly, no love for Lovie during the game)

5.  On Jason Pierre-Paul, “He has the longest arms of any defensive lineman I’ve ever seen!”

4.  On Bradshaw and Jacobs, “They’re best friends. …these two guys love each other, and they are the energy source of the New York Giants!”

3.  This one time, at band camp…. “Say his name, Mike. I love it when they do these four syllable names.  Sanzenbacher!”

2.  Channeling his inner Mr. T., “When you get the corner for Brandon Jacobs and let him go at full speed, I pity the fool who has to tackle that guy.”

1.  So punny, “Gabe Carimi, Mike, will ca-ream ye, get it?”