Jeff Hart: Friday Linkfest for May 11, 2012
By: Jeff Hart | Posted: May 11, 2012
The “end of the NFL as we know it” discussion has left the blogs and officially gone mainstream, with Tony Kornheiser appearing on Sportscenter yesterday to prophecy football becoming the next boxing. I’m not sure boxing ever achieved the massive popularity Kornheiser ascribes to it, even when people had nothing to listen to but radios. Nonetheless – point taken, Tony. Now let’s toss it over to Tom Jackson for some JACKED UP!
Despite evidence Melissa pointed out earlier this week that football players actually live longer lives than the rest of us fat, cigarette smoking, no health insurance layabouts, that doesn’t mean they necessarily live better lives. Jack Bechta has some sincere and smart ideas about how we can take better care of our favorite athletes post-football.
Of course, I have some insincere and implausible ideas for how players can improve their lives right now.
First, like all of us, they can cut out fast food. Josh Freeman ditched Taco Bell this off-season and is down 20 pounds as a result.
It’s a known fact that dog owners live longer than lonely cat owners, so every NFL player should get a pooch. Just don’t conveniently rename the poor, confused animal from ‘Bronco’ to ‘Bronx’ for the sake of nonsensical pandering (the Jets are not the Yankees). Also, I hear appearing on reality television when your locker room is already a disaster visible from space is a good way to reduce stress levels!
Players wishing to stay healthy might also want to avoid playing against the 49ers. Those guys play dirty, at least according to Ben Roethlisberger (and he practices against James Harrison, so he would know).
And finally, if players really want to improve their quality of life – and this goes for you non-athletes too – stop going to Supercuts. Look at the amazing head of hair Jimmy Clausen just had ruined by opting for a $10 barber school dropout. Beware!
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