Browsing: Feature Articles

Balancing the scales of gender equality one pound of flesh at a time…. Today’s DCOM is Eric Decker, previously/currently of New York Jets fame but who is reportedly on the outs. Decker is rumored to be included in New York’s veteran dumpfest but remains on the Jets roster as the team first searches for a trade partner. We shouldn’t feel too bad for Decker, though, having leveraged targets from Peyton Manning to the tune of a $36 million contract in 2014, and locking up sultry country singer, Jessie James, to a lifetime contract (with a buyout clause, I’m sure) in…

Balancing the scales of gender inequality one pound of manly flesh at a time… Today’s DCOM is Ryan Fitzpatrick, a delicious combination of brains and brawn.  And oh, that beard. Like a well-manicured arboretum, that beard says I’m here to party but keeping it to two drinks because I gotta get home and finish building that distressed wood table. No wonder Fitz got picked up by Tampa Bay, over the likes of Colin Kaepernick, despite having a 12 to 17 TD-to-interception ratio and a league-low 69.6 passer rating last year. Now that Fitz has traded the gloomy confines of New York for…

Welcome to another rendition of “Positively Gruden,” where we chronicle the top praise, plaudits, and pontifications from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  Last night’s game was a three and a half quarter snoozefest, with Andrew Luck looking like a beleaguered Civil War general with no ammunition for his musket and a bad case of gout.  But like the South, Andrew Luck always rises again, and delivered a stirring 17-point comeback to send the game into overtime.  But that just led to one final Luck interception, which set the table for Graham Gano, aka Mr. Clutch, to seal a Panthers victory…

Welcome to another rendition of “Positively Gruden,” where we chronicle the top cheers, compliments, and commendations from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  Last night’s game was a veritable snoozefest for three and half quarters, before turning into complete chaos culminating in a “walkoff wildcat” touchdown by Le’Veon Bell as the clock struck 0:00.  You know what they say in coaching: it’s a great play if it works. But we shouldn’t let the game’s ending take away from the Grudenisms, because there were some real doozies in last night’s broadcast.  From flags on the beach, to stadiums, to skin flutes, to…

Welcome to another rendition of ‘Positively Gruden,’ our weekly column chronicling the top praise, plaudits, and pontifications of America’s favorite fawning former coach.  For three and half quarters, last night’s game was a veritable snoozefest of incompetent offense, shaken only by brief interludes of Russell Wilson’s trademark fifteen second scrambles leading to a big play.  But when Lions scored a defensive touchdown off a Wilson fumble and promptly drove down on the next possession on the brink of scoring a game-winning touchdown, the game suddenly got interesting.  Of course, Lions gonna Lions, and the usually sure-handed Calvin Johnson lost a…

Welcome to another rendition of Positively Gruden, where we chronicle the top gushes, guffaws, and gesticulations from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  If there’s one thing Jon Gruden loves, it’s efficient offenses, which was on prime display Monday night with Aaron Rodgers the Packers.  Gruden could barely contain his excitement in comparing Rodgers to Joe Montana, Stephen Curry, and yes, even Muhammed Ali.  This made for a non-stop lovefest, with Grudenisms flying off the TV screen. The game itself was essentially secondary, but we were prepared for that with Alex “checkdown” Smith no match for the high-powered Packers offense. As…

Welcome to another rendition of “Positively Gruden,” where we chronicle the top praise, plaudits, and pontifications from America’s favorite fawning former coach. As we all expected, the hapless  dominant New York Jets put the beat down on Andrew Luck and his high-powered anemic Indianapolis Colts offense. It’s almost as if one of these teams had DirecTV and the other had cable! Coach Gruden, for his part, couldn’t get enough of the Jets defense with all their “big people” running around and wreaking havoc. Ryan FitzHarvardPatrick wasn’t too shabby himself, with his high IQ eclipsed only by his glorious manbeard. Just…

Tim Tebow returned to the NFL last Sunday, playing most of the second half of the Eagles’ preseason game against the Colts. Never ones to miss a story we have no choice but to cover, we at The Football Girl watched the game and pulled some reactions off Twitter to give you a sense of what Tebowmania circa 2015 is like. 1:00 Game on! Sanchez to start.    Sanchez touchdown! There’s a shot of the QBs on the sideline. Barkley should be going in for the next series. Barkley in for Sanchez. Barkley is having a good half. Impressing a lot…

Every morning we serve up prime cuts of NFL players, because we believe in gender equality for all things including clickbait.  We’ve been reticent to go the Favre route in our “Daily Cut of Meat” series, as his well-known pictureography isn’t exactly the kind of ‘meat’ we’re looking for.  But, in honor of a big event that was especially dear to Green Bay last weekend – National Ice Cream Day – we felt compelled to give you a sweet taste of Brett, purely from the waist up.  Now here’s a selfie we can get behind.    Be sure to check…

Be it a political office, an executive boardroom or an Olympic platform, history has proven that, as women, we can not only compete, but dominate in our particular area of choice. And what better way to extend our prowess than by joining in on the competitive fun of fantasy football? As a brand new season of the NFL approaches, many women will observe men flocking from all corners towards the glow of the almighty flat screen TV to catch up on the minutiae regarding their favorite NFL team and players. These guys will clock countless hours cheering and jeering with…

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