The Wise Guy

The Wise Guy is our media columnist. He majors in Jon Gruden with his signature Positively Gruden column, and has a minor in quarterback appearance.

It’s time for your latest installment of “Positively Gruden,” a list of the top absurd/hyperbolic lines from our favorite coach-turned NFL analyst.  This week shaped up to be an especially challenging one for the TFGPG staff, as we were treated to ...

As any “Hard Knocks” aficionado knows, the fourth episode is where things finally start to get serious because it corresponds to “cut day,” when teams are required to trim their roster to 75 players.  At this point, all the practice montages and ...

Welcome to another rendition of “Positively Gruden,” where I break down the top praise, plaudits, and pontifications from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  After last week’s one-sided 49ers-Redskins affair, America was looking forward to ...

It’s hard to imagine the Chicago Bears getting no respect, but it’s true.  With one of the the most recognizable brands, most devoted fan bases, and storied lineage in all of sports, the Bears have all the makings of your classic mainstream media hyp...

Like many kids, Christmas used to be my favorite day of the year.  Growing up in a small rural town in Illinois, with two government employees as parents, Christmas was the one day of the year that I knew I’d get the stuff tha...

Welcome to another rendition of Positively Gruden, where I break down the top cheers, compliments, and commendations from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  On a night when the Bears finally got around to retiring Mike Ditka’s #89 jersey, the ...

While basking in my Bears euphoria during the second half of their beat down against the Seahawks on Sunday, I made an offhand comment that seemed quite obvious at the time but is apparently quite contrarian: I would rather have Jay Cutler than Ma...

Welcome to another rendition of “Positively Gruden,” where I chronicle the top praise, plaudits, and pontifications from America’s favorite fawning former coach.  This week’s Ravens-Lions clash featured one of the most dominating performance in t...

After months of intense negotiations, The Wise Guy is happy to report that The Football Girl has agreed to end her lockout of my services and, well, let me back into the office.  Contract terms are undisclosed, but let’s just say I’m earning well ove...